Andy Parsons-Idiot!

What’s your favourite word in the English language? Pulchritudinous What’s the one thing you do better than anyone else you know? Nothing springs to mind. I need to hang out with some different people. Given the choice, what’s your ultimate walk on music? It changes. No one track can satiate continuously. Karaoke: what do you delight/terrify the audience with? Ma na ma na. Tell us a joke. I’ll tell you the set-up to a joke and then you can come and see me live to find out what the punchline is. Why did Herman van Rompuy cross the road? Who or what first made you laugh? Adults pulling faces. You make Mastermind, what’s your specialist subject? The difficulties of thinking straight whilst sat in a black leather chair with a hot spotlight focused intensely on you. Ever been star-struck? Definitely got excited meeting Gus Honeybun from Television South West aged 8. Our round, what are you drinking? A glass of Chateau Latour Pauillac. Ever have a celebrity crush? Yes. But it’s a bit like the walk-on music – it’s always changing. How would you like to die? Painlessly. If you could go back in time and sleep with any figure in history who would it be and why? Anybody who was pulchritudinous. What’s the best heckle you’ve ever heard? Stop talking before I wet myself. Favourite venue to play and why? Any well-run well-supported recently refurbished old theatre What’s the worst/most memorable job you’ve had? I was once a very lazy car park attendant, which essentially involved sun-bathing for 8 hours a day. When and where were you first on stage? Alice in Wonderland playing the Ten of Hearts at Primary School. Ever stolen anything? No. Just borrowed for an extended period of time. What comedian have you watched/listened to more than any other? Probably myself. Those edits can take a very long time. If you weren’t doing this, you’d be… There is no choice. Strap in!